Getting Back Perspective

I don't have much time these days (or any day for that matter). I've been busy looking at my to-do list, at my calendar, scheduling meetings, scheduling when to do what. My outlook calendar is so filled with stuff that events and items that I get a minor claustrophobia just by looking at it. :)

I've been so busy that I forgot what "not-busy" feels like... and this is a bad thing. Like the compulsive junk-food eater who is slowly losing his health not realizing that it'll eventually lead him to obesity, I've been busy-ing myself all the way.. not really realizing where I'm heading towards.

Let's just say that my life has a pretty high attrition level at this point. and when you're under so much attrition, you can only focus on "what now?", "what's next?", without really looking too much into the future. My life is a battle-field. I live to aim, shoot, and move forward, not knowing where and when the end of the battle will be. The battle is mental, physical, and intellectual.

But I think I've been so engrossed in the battles that I've totally forgotten what the war is all about. I need to get that big picture back. I need to regain my perspective. The hard thing about perspectives is that they're not what that you can get in a day. A perspective is a way to look at something. And me having lost it is like a blind man trying to get his sight back.